- Early exposure. Most guys who get addicted to porn start early. They see the stuff when they are very young, and it gets its foot in the door.
- Addiction. Later comes addiction. You keep coming back to porn. It becomes a regular part of your life. You're hooked. You can't quit.
- Escalation. After a while, escalation begins. You start to look for more and more graphic porn. You start using porn that would have disgusted you when you started. Now it excites you.
- Desensitization. Eventually, you start to become numb. Even the most graphic, degrading porn doesn't excite you anymore. You become desperate to feel the same thrill again but can't find it.
- Acting out sexually. At this point, many men make a dangerous jump and start acting out sexually. They move from the paper and plastic images of porn to the real world.
An addict may start fantasizing about what it would be like to actually rape a woman. Qith just a little push, spme addicts rape then killed her to cover their tracks. Serial rapist-killer Ted Bundy got started with a porn addiction and when that wasn't enough, he tried the real thing — rape, and then murder. When he succeeded, he did it again. And again.
If you see any of the patterns, if porn is beginning to control your life, you need to put the brakes on right now. Perhaps you find yourself needing to see increasingly graphic pornography. You're masturbating more and more often. You're starting to take "acting out" risks and you believe the lies.
Lie: Women are less than human. The women in Playboy magazine are called "bunnies," making them cute little animals or "playmates," making them a toy. Porn often refers to women as animals, playthings, or body parts. Some pornography shows only the body and doesn’t show the face at all. The idea that women are real human beings with thoughts and emotions is played down.
Lie: Women are a "sport." Some sports magazines have a swimsuit issue. This suggests that women are just some kind of sport. Porn views sex as a game and in a game: You have to win, conquer or score.
Lie: Women are property. It's common to see pictures of the slick car with the sexy girl draped over it. The unspoken message is, "Buy one, and you get them both." Hard-core porn carries this even further. It displays women like merchandise in a catalogue, exposing them as openly as possible for the customer to look at. It's not surprising that many young men think that if they have spent some money taking a girl out, they have a right to have sex with her. Porn tells us that women can be bought.
Lie: A woman's value depends on the attractiveness of her body. Overweight or less attractive women are ridiculed in porn. They are called dogs, whales, pigs or worse, simply because they don't fit into porn's criteria of the perfect woman. In fact, if someone is attracted to a heavyset woman, porn labels that a fetish, which means sexual obsession or hang-up that isn't "natural." Porn doesn’t care about a woman's mind or personality, only her body