Snowden threw away his $200,000 yearly salary, his sexy pole-dancer girlfriend, and his comfy home in beautiful Hawaii just to tell the world that the government is spying on us - duh! Here is Ed Snowden’s sketchy legend filled with red flags, alarm bells, sirens and flashing lights even for half-wits.
FIRST. In 2003, at age 19, without even a high school diploma, Snowden enlisted in the Army and began a training program to join the Special Forces. How exactly did an uneducated newly enlisted 19 year old soldier get into this elite training program?
Snowden reportedly broke both legs during a Special Forces training exercise and got discharged from the Army. Why was he discharged? If he was accepted into the Special Forces training program because he had special self-taught computer whiz skills, then why discharge him over broken legs? Did they say to him, “Sorry, Ed, but with two broken legs we just don’t think you can hack into terrorist data anymore. Try Walmart. They always have openings.”
NEXT. Circa 2003, Snowden lands a job as a security guard for an NSA facility at the University of Maryland.
NEXT. Snowden shifts jobs and abracadabra! He's through the door into the CIA, in IT without even a high school diploma.
NEXT. In 2007, Snowden is sent to Geneva. He’s only 23 but the CIA gives him a diplomat cover story and puts him in charge of maintaining computer-network security for the CIA and US diplomats. Major job for just a kid! Now he's given access to a wide range of classified documents. Smell fishy, yet?
NEXT. In 2009, Snowden leaves the CIA. Why? Because he felt disillusioned. After only two years with the CIA in Geneva, Snowden had the capability to take down the whole US inter-agency intelligence network, or a major chunk of it. What??? If you buy that without further inquiry, there's condos for sale on Mars.
So, Snowden leaves the CIA and starts work in the private sector Booze Allen Hamilton which is majority owned by The Carlyle Group "mobsters" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AS67HZR8Ogo)
At Booz Allen, Snowden gets assigned to work at the NSA even though he's an outsider and gets access to so much sensitive NSA data that he can take down the whole US intelligence network in a single day. Smell fishy, yet?
NEXT. Ed Snowden steals thousands of highly protected NSA documents because…he had a thumb drive. What's a thimb drive? It's a USB portable storage device the size of a human thumb. This thumb-sized weapon breached the inner sanctum of the most sophisticated information agency in the world!!!
Not only did Snowden stroll into NSA with a thumb drive, he "magically" knew exactly how to break through all the security layers that stop people like Snowden from stealing classified documents.
Okay. Let’s recap. We have a new guy coming to work for NSA. A self-taught whiz kid. An outside contractor from Booz Allen. He’s not an in-house employee of the NSA. He's 29 years old. No high school diploma. Worked for the CIA and quit. Hmm. Why did he quit? Oh, never mind, who cares? No problem. Let’s give this kid access to our most sensitive data. Sure. Why not? Everything that we keep behind a thousand walls where you have to pledge the life of your first-born against the possibility you’ll go rogue? Sure. Let Snowden see it all. What the hell. He seems like a nice kid.
NSA is known as the most sophisticated spying agency in the world. If you cross the street in Anyplace, USA to buy an ice cream cone, on a Tuesday afternoon in July at 5:03 PM, they know about it and how many times you licked it and who you were with when you licked it. But this agency, with all its vast power, dollars and intelligence…can’t track one of its own, as he steals the store. Can’t keep the store locked. Can’t track the movements of this guy who made up a story about needing treatment in Hong Kong for epilepsy and then skipped the country and wound up in Russia???
Just can’t find him. Couldn't find him in Hong Kong where he sat down for a video interview with Glenn Greenwald of The Guardian. Couldn't find the “safe house” or “hotel” where he was staying. Nope. Can’t spy on him in Hong Kong. Can’t figure out he’s booked a flight to Russia. Can’t intercept him at the airport before he leaves for Russia. Too difficult.
Snowden, their employee, is walking around with four laptops containing the keys to the Kingdom, the keys to all the secret spying knowledge in the known cosmos but they can’t locate those laptops with legs.
In the aftermath of the Snowden affair, NSA geniuses with IQs of over 180 working for the richest, smartest, most secretive agency in the world decided that they needed to draft “tighter rules and procedures” for their employees. Right. They hadn’t realized before Snowden that they’d overlooked their own security and left doors open for employees to steal everything, copy it and store it on a few laptops???